I'm currently home, alone, and watching Paranormal Activity 2. My guess is that I won't sleep for the next two nights, minimum. I'm really getting into the Halloween time of year though, so I feel like I have to watch some scary movies. I also started working on my snack for Cara's annual Halloween party. I'm making a dip that looks like a spide web, but tonight I actually made homemade tortilla chips in the shapes of halloween goodies. We've got ghosts, black cats, pumpkins, and bat.
A lot of things have changed again for me! I FINALLY got a car!! I went with the Camry, in "Aloe Green Metallic" so I named her Vera. Vera and I got in our first bit of trouble today. I got a parking ticket. Woops. All I have is street parking here, and half of the street is metered. I normally get home from work a little before six and have left again by 7:30 am, so I guess I never noticed that you can only park in the metered spots between 6pm and 9am without paying (and on weekends). So I went down to my car today around noon *yay day off* and had a stupid parking ticket on there. Annoying. Anyways, what is MORE annoying is that when I looked at the back of the ticket to see where I send my payment, I don't send it to the city that I live in, I send it to Newport Beach, CA? Really? What the hell do they need with my $15? I'd much rather send it to my city, to say....repave the streets or something? I dont know. That just struck me as being odd.
Also - this just in - I FINALLY have the internet again :-) I've lived in the dark ages (without cable and internet) at home for the last year and survived, and AT&T called me with a great deal on the interwebs (after my neighbor who left his wireless unprotected moved out) so I buckled down and got it. So I can now continue watching NetFlix and paying my bills from home instead of dragging them to and from work all the time. It's like a whole new world... kinda. For me.
Yep - so those are the two big things happening in my life right now.... car and internet...
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Friday, October 14, 2011
5 Things I Will No Longer Deal With In Relationships
So, for about the last month, I have been truly single for the first time since I was 20 years old. What do I mean by truly single? No boyfriend, no men I've kept on the back-burner to call up, no men in my cross hairs, no prospects. I am single. And not in a "I need to run to the bar and pick up the first thing that talks to me," type of way, but in the, "I want to figure out some more things about myself before I go thrusting myself into another disaster," type of way.
I've suspected it before, but have been too proud to admit it - I think I might as well face it, I'm addicted to love. Even though I am a fully independent, and what some may consider even a successful woman, I've always had the notion that someday I would actually bump into Prince Charming and we would have this super-romantic courtship & get married in a castle underneath a rainbow or some ridiculous shit like that. The Disney Complex, if you will. I enjoy knowing someone's thinking about me. Vain? Maybe. Honest? Yep.
Anyways, over the last month I've had some time to evaluate things I will no longer be willing to deal with in relationships, and here's a few things I've come up with so far.
1. I will no longer consider "house dates" dates.
No sir, sorry. You coming over to lay around on my couch with me can be nice, and acceptable sometimes, but this is not a date. Get in the habit of doing this, and good luck ever seeing a real date out of that man. I'm a lady. Take me out and treat me like one. House dates are especially not dates when the guy comes over at like 8pm and I've already cooked for myself (and because I am a good person, I've made a point to make a bunch extra for him to eat). Wait a minute, did you just trick me into making you dinner? And then cleaning up after you? Eff that! I'm not your mother!
2. I will no longer pursue men.
What ever happened to men liking the chase? Some men expect women to fawn all over them like they are a designer purse at a warehouse sale. I will no longer be that woman. I'm not trying to be difficult, but if you want to get in contact with me again, ask me for my number. I'm not going to assume that any chemistry I thought I felt was mutual.
3. Text messaging will not be our primary means of communication
If you want to know how my day was, pick up the phone like a big boy, call me, and ask. No more texting throughout the day (leaving absolutely nothing to talk about when the work day is over). Let me focus on my work while I am in the office, and we can focus on each other while we are on the phone, or on a date. Too much is "lost in translation" via anything other than actual person to person communication. I'm done getting upset, or causing a fight, when what I text you was something completely harmless, and was misinterpreted, and caused a nuclear fall out.
4. I will no longer date men who care more about the way that they look than I do.
You look in every mirror you walk by and smile at yourself? Sweet. Do you also have pictures of yourself in the bathroom on your social networking sites? Awesome. You're a man, right? You are supposed to be the hairy goofy looking one and I am supposed to be the pretty pretty princess. Stop getting it twisted. And stop buying knock off designer accessories. If you can't afford the real thing, just don't try. Any real woman will know the difference and judge you for it.
5. Spell Check!
I will never again date a man who doesn't know the difference between to, too, and two, or your and you're. Do I even have to explain why?
I've suspected it before, but have been too proud to admit it - I think I might as well face it, I'm addicted to love. Even though I am a fully independent, and what some may consider even a successful woman, I've always had the notion that someday I would actually bump into Prince Charming and we would have this super-romantic courtship & get married in a castle underneath a rainbow or some ridiculous shit like that. The Disney Complex, if you will. I enjoy knowing someone's thinking about me. Vain? Maybe. Honest? Yep.
Anyways, over the last month I've had some time to evaluate things I will no longer be willing to deal with in relationships, and here's a few things I've come up with so far.
1. I will no longer consider "house dates" dates.
No sir, sorry. You coming over to lay around on my couch with me can be nice, and acceptable sometimes, but this is not a date. Get in the habit of doing this, and good luck ever seeing a real date out of that man. I'm a lady. Take me out and treat me like one. House dates are especially not dates when the guy comes over at like 8pm and I've already cooked for myself (and because I am a good person, I've made a point to make a bunch extra for him to eat). Wait a minute, did you just trick me into making you dinner? And then cleaning up after you? Eff that! I'm not your mother!
2. I will no longer pursue men.
What ever happened to men liking the chase? Some men expect women to fawn all over them like they are a designer purse at a warehouse sale. I will no longer be that woman. I'm not trying to be difficult, but if you want to get in contact with me again, ask me for my number. I'm not going to assume that any chemistry I thought I felt was mutual.
3. Text messaging will not be our primary means of communication
If you want to know how my day was, pick up the phone like a big boy, call me, and ask. No more texting throughout the day (leaving absolutely nothing to talk about when the work day is over). Let me focus on my work while I am in the office, and we can focus on each other while we are on the phone, or on a date. Too much is "lost in translation" via anything other than actual person to person communication. I'm done getting upset, or causing a fight, when what I text you was something completely harmless, and was misinterpreted, and caused a nuclear fall out.
4. I will no longer date men who care more about the way that they look than I do.
You look in every mirror you walk by and smile at yourself? Sweet. Do you also have pictures of yourself in the bathroom on your social networking sites? Awesome. You're a man, right? You are supposed to be the hairy goofy looking one and I am supposed to be the pretty pretty princess. Stop getting it twisted. And stop buying knock off designer accessories. If you can't afford the real thing, just don't try. Any real woman will know the difference and judge you for it.
5. Spell Check!
I will never again date a man who doesn't know the difference between to, too, and two, or your and you're. Do I even have to explain why?
Thursday, October 13, 2011
I'm learning to HATE shopping
Car shopping, that is. Let's get that straight. I'm sure shoes & purses would still be fun but once I actually get this shit done with, I won't be able to afford a new pair of shoes or a purse for the next five years...
But really, for misdemeanor crimes, I think the new form of capital punishment should be finding the best deal on a new vehicle. And fielding the nonstop phone calls & emails from seedy, aggressive, car salesfolk (sadly enough, as of today, I've found the female salespeople I've dealt with much less tolerable than the men). Honestly, four phone calls & SIX emails in a 24 hour time period from the SAME dealership?! Jesus! These bitches are more needy than any man I've ever dated. Hands down.
So far, the Toyota Camry is still my front runner. I went to a Honda dealership today & drove a CRV & a Civic. The CRV was nice, but it didn't handle as well as the Camry. And my experience with the Civic was.... bad. Which was shocking because we all know these things are normally as hardy as a cockroach. Anyways, it had four miles on it, and as I drove it off the lot, it fell out of gear. An automatic. Fell out of gear. So I said, "uhhhh.... What's going on?" and the salesmen told me to pull over (on a four lane road of course... Heart palpitations). He got behind the wheel & drove it back to the dealership & said I proooobbbbably just did something wrong. What? I drove it .5 miles. What did I do? So, regardless of all the nifty buttons & colors on the dash of the new Civic, it's off my list.
Tonight's salesmen was playing the "I'm not going to harass you, check me out, I'm laid back" game.... But I began to have a sneaking suspicion that he just wasn't listening to a word I was saying.... Which I verified. He asked me three separate times where I lived. Each time I said Lakewood. Three times he responded, "Oh, did you grow up there?" The first time I grew up in Erie, the second time Smithfield, and the third time Pittsburg. He didn't catch that. And he looked like a wombat.
But really, for misdemeanor crimes, I think the new form of capital punishment should be finding the best deal on a new vehicle. And fielding the nonstop phone calls & emails from seedy, aggressive, car salesfolk (sadly enough, as of today, I've found the female salespeople I've dealt with much less tolerable than the men). Honestly, four phone calls & SIX emails in a 24 hour time period from the SAME dealership?! Jesus! These bitches are more needy than any man I've ever dated. Hands down.
So far, the Toyota Camry is still my front runner. I went to a Honda dealership today & drove a CRV & a Civic. The CRV was nice, but it didn't handle as well as the Camry. And my experience with the Civic was.... bad. Which was shocking because we all know these things are normally as hardy as a cockroach. Anyways, it had four miles on it, and as I drove it off the lot, it fell out of gear. An automatic. Fell out of gear. So I said, "uhhhh.... What's going on?" and the salesmen told me to pull over (on a four lane road of course... Heart palpitations). He got behind the wheel & drove it back to the dealership & said I proooobbbbably just did something wrong. What? I drove it .5 miles. What did I do? So, regardless of all the nifty buttons & colors on the dash of the new Civic, it's off my list.
Tonight's salesmen was playing the "I'm not going to harass you, check me out, I'm laid back" game.... But I began to have a sneaking suspicion that he just wasn't listening to a word I was saying.... Which I verified. He asked me three separate times where I lived. Each time I said Lakewood. Three times he responded, "Oh, did you grow up there?" The first time I grew up in Erie, the second time Smithfield, and the third time Pittsburg. He didn't catch that. And he looked like a wombat.
Location:My own personal hell
I'm not the ONLY one
who is over internet creeping:
http://www.thefrisky.com/2011-10-06/soapbox-i%e2%80%99m-sick-of-online-stalking/#more-1513552
who thinks being a 20-something kinda blows:
http://www.trutv.com/dumb_as_a_blog/gallery/20-dumbest-things-about-being-in-your-twenties.html
great minds, people. all thinking alike.
http://www.thefrisky.com/2011-10-06/soapbox-i%e2%80%99m-sick-of-online-stalking/#more-1513552
who thinks being a 20-something kinda blows:
http://www.trutv.com/dumb_as_a_blog/gallery/20-dumbest-things-about-being-in-your-twenties.html
great minds, people. all thinking alike.
Monday, October 10, 2011
Home is where the is.
Welp, I'm back in my place after a whirlwind tour of the South (and 8 hours worth of pit stopping on the way back from the airport).
I love being home. I always develop narcolepsy when I'm there (read: I nap more than I stay awake) but Smithfield is just a great place.
I got to snuggle with my old man, Tucker. At the age of 13.5 he has become mostly deaf & doesn't move around a lot, but is still the best dog a kid could ever have. Also got to snuggle with Ms. Reggie. Who is the sweetest & goofiest dog ever.
Went to the Freedom Hunters fundraiser at The Tilted Kilt... Saw my Dad in a skirt. They raised $1,800 in one night for a great cause! I stayed sober (good work!) and chatted with my long lost aunt & uncle - they hugged me... But other than that no real weirdness.
And went car shopping. The only picture I could share in regards to that is me biting my nails & wanting to vomit over the cost of things. No purchase yet, but I really need to get something in the next month. Ugh. I found a car I wanted to just buy & drive home (instead of flying back) & marebear also thought it was a good idea but the budman said it was unwise to impulse buy on such a big purchase... Hmph!
One thing that always amazes me about the south is how well mannered everyone is. I think us Yankees should be forced to go down there for classes on how to behave properly as children, and maybe refresher courses yearly... I know quite a few people who could use that. Juuuust saying.
I love being home. I always develop narcolepsy when I'm there (read: I nap more than I stay awake) but Smithfield is just a great place.
I got to snuggle with my old man, Tucker. At the age of 13.5 he has become mostly deaf & doesn't move around a lot, but is still the best dog a kid could ever have. Also got to snuggle with Ms. Reggie. Who is the sweetest & goofiest dog ever.
Went to the Freedom Hunters fundraiser at The Tilted Kilt... Saw my Dad in a skirt. They raised $1,800 in one night for a great cause! I stayed sober (good work!) and chatted with my long lost aunt & uncle - they hugged me... But other than that no real weirdness.
And went car shopping. The only picture I could share in regards to that is me biting my nails & wanting to vomit over the cost of things. No purchase yet, but I really need to get something in the next month. Ugh. I found a car I wanted to just buy & drive home (instead of flying back) & marebear also thought it was a good idea but the budman said it was unwise to impulse buy on such a big purchase... Hmph!
One thing that always amazes me about the south is how well mannered everyone is. I think us Yankees should be forced to go down there for classes on how to behave properly as children, and maybe refresher courses yearly... I know quite a few people who could use that. Juuuust saying.
Location:Back in Ohio!
Thursday, October 6, 2011
My vacation from "The Social Network"
I'm currently smashed between two men, who are even taller than me, on an airplane heading to Atlanta. I feel like we are playing Twister without the colored dots. Every time one of us needs to move, even slightly, there's this awkward tango that goes on so all of our legs can fit... Almost. Why wouldn't this be the most appropriate time to work on updating my subpar blog? My lay-over in the ATL, before I head to Smithfield, VA via Newport News, is a short one, but I'm still carrying a small hope that by some grace of god I will run into Ludacris. A white girl can dream, can't she?
Anyways, since my last post, I've made a notable change in my day-to-day life. Wait for it - I have deactivated my Facebook account. Cold turkey. It happened.
whhhhhaaa?
Yep. Me (who was unapologetically addicted to checking FB) stopped. And I am planning on staying away for at least a whole month. At first I felt like a heroin addict trying to kick, but after a week without it, I really could care less. It's almost refreshing to NOT know what 700 people (most of whom I've probably said about two words to on a yearly basis -HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!... via the Internet...) are having for dinner... Or how much they love love love their new (insert recent purchase/birth/love interest)!!!
I actually don't feel as cynical about the whole "turn off" experiment as I think I just sounded. For realsies!
Here's why I did it:
1. I was tired of a relentless person (who will rename unnamed & unspoken of - also for realsies - so dont try to suck it out of me) trying to get in contact with me. I was hoping the aforementioned had forgotten I existed. No such luck.
2. After a recent experience with something that I think any mildly respectable person would have chosen to do in-person was instead done using a technologically advanced medium (cough cough joe jonas ehem) I needed a time out from technology. I mean, really... Remember when we used to check in on friends to see how they were doing? (I mean in person, not by checking their status updates) Ahhh the good ole days. It's like we've all become so comfortable knowing every move that we all make that some barrier of genuine interest has been lost.
3. That shit stirs up wayyyyy too much drama. Period.
So, now that I've gotten over the jitters each time I unlock my phone and realize the friendly white&blue F is gone, I've been thinking of trying to be better about the blog, which really knows about anyways. Maybe even if I do end up going pro-zuckerberg again after I hit the end of my month long vacay, I'll link it to this mess :-)
I was out to dinner with a friend the other night & we were discussing our mutual adoration of list-making. If you've ever spent any time with me directly after a work day, I'm sure you've seen one of my token post-it notes stuck to the back of my phone of "things-I-remembered-I-still-wanted-to-remember-by-the-time-I-finally-got-home." Might seem a little lame, and a little early-onset Alzheimer's, but these notes really save my life & help keep me super organized. I digress on notes, and turning my attention back to lists. I love lists as much as I love my post it notes. I've always been a big proponent of the pro/con lists when making hefty decisions (judge me), but I also like fun lists. Likkkkkeeeee: things I want to do by the end of the day/week/month/year/decade, celebrities I'd sleep with, books I want to read, things I WANT to buy, things I NEED to buy.... You get the point. I think I'm going to start adding "lists" to the things I blog about. Mmhmm!
Speaking of lists, I got this amazing list emailed to me the other day from one of my girlfriends. It was a list of fun things we (me, her, and any combination of the rest of her family) could do where we would be in public where I may be able to pick up men. Hys.ter.I.cal. And amazing. And when I make a list about why my friends are better than yours, will be near the top.
I'm sure I will have something interesting to write about after my trip home (which includes a night at a bar with my parents & an uncle I haven't seen/heard from in at least 5 years & an aunt I haven't seen/heard from in probably 20 years). Oh, and my dad will be wearing a skirt (kilt. whatever). Sounds like a good enough reason to over-consume to me!
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Anyways, since my last post, I've made a notable change in my day-to-day life. Wait for it - I have deactivated my Facebook account. Cold turkey. It happened.
whhhhhaaa?
Yep. Me (who was unapologetically addicted to checking FB) stopped. And I am planning on staying away for at least a whole month. At first I felt like a heroin addict trying to kick, but after a week without it, I really could care less. It's almost refreshing to NOT know what 700 people (most of whom I've probably said about two words to on a yearly basis -HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!... via the Internet...) are having for dinner... Or how much they love love love their new (insert recent purchase/birth/love interest)!!!
I actually don't feel as cynical about the whole "turn off" experiment as I think I just sounded. For realsies!
Here's why I did it:
1. I was tired of a relentless person (who will rename unnamed & unspoken of - also for realsies - so dont try to suck it out of me) trying to get in contact with me. I was hoping the aforementioned had forgotten I existed. No such luck.
2. After a recent experience with something that I think any mildly respectable person would have chosen to do in-person was instead done using a technologically advanced medium (cough cough joe jonas ehem) I needed a time out from technology. I mean, really... Remember when we used to check in on friends to see how they were doing? (I mean in person, not by checking their status updates) Ahhh the good ole days. It's like we've all become so comfortable knowing every move that we all make that some barrier of genuine interest has been lost.
3. That shit stirs up wayyyyy too much drama. Period.
So, now that I've gotten over the jitters each time I unlock my phone and realize the friendly white&blue F is gone, I've been thinking of trying to be better about the blog, which really knows about anyways. Maybe even if I do end up going pro-zuckerberg again after I hit the end of my month long vacay, I'll link it to this mess :-)
I was out to dinner with a friend the other night & we were discussing our mutual adoration of list-making. If you've ever spent any time with me directly after a work day, I'm sure you've seen one of my token post-it notes stuck to the back of my phone of "things-I-remembered-I-still-wanted-to-remember-by-the-time-I-finally-got-home." Might seem a little lame, and a little early-onset Alzheimer's, but these notes really save my life & help keep me super organized. I digress on notes, and turning my attention back to lists. I love lists as much as I love my post it notes. I've always been a big proponent of the pro/con lists when making hefty decisions (judge me), but I also like fun lists. Likkkkkeeeee: things I want to do by the end of the day/week/month/year/decade, celebrities I'd sleep with, books I want to read, things I WANT to buy, things I NEED to buy.... You get the point. I think I'm going to start adding "lists" to the things I blog about. Mmhmm!
Speaking of lists, I got this amazing list emailed to me the other day from one of my girlfriends. It was a list of fun things we (me, her, and any combination of the rest of her family) could do where we would be in public where I may be able to pick up men. Hys.ter.I.cal. And amazing. And when I make a list about why my friends are better than yours, will be near the top.
I'm sure I will have something interesting to write about after my trip home (which includes a night at a bar with my parents & an uncle I haven't seen/heard from in at least 5 years & an aunt I haven't seen/heard from in probably 20 years). Oh, and my dad will be wearing a skirt (kilt. whatever). Sounds like a good enough reason to over-consume to me!
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Location:33,000 feet in the air
Monday, August 29, 2011
The First Line of Defense
When most people are confronted with an unpleasant situation, mainly socially, I think it's pretty typical for people's first line of defense to be a reaction. Right? I mean, you hear something unpleasant, and you scrunch up your face, and "ewwww." Or, say for example, the guy you are dating breaks up with you, you laugh, "HA! His loss. He was an asshole anyways."
I've recently realized that at the first hint of things going in a direction any which way other than exactly the way I planned things to go (I'm a planner. Way in advance. Deal with it.), my first line of defense is what I like to call "The Emotional Potato Bug." Catchy, no? The Potato Bug - I think that's the scientific classification for those little bugs that look similar to insectual armadillos that when anything goes near it they curl up into balls and roll away (genus: hideawayous fromeverythingy). My M.O: if I feel like I'm putting myself on the line in any way, and the receiving end of it starts to backpeddle, I completely ball up.
I've recently realized that at the first hint of things going in a direction any which way other than exactly the way I planned things to go (I'm a planner. Way in advance. Deal with it.), my first line of defense is what I like to call "The Emotional Potato Bug." Catchy, no? The Potato Bug - I think that's the scientific classification for those little bugs that look similar to insectual armadillos that when anything goes near it they curl up into balls and roll away (genus: hideawayous fromeverythingy). My M.O: if I feel like I'm putting myself on the line in any way, and the receiving end of it starts to backpeddle, I completely ball up.
Picture two trains running on two parallel tracks, both going the same place (listen i dont know why they wouldnt just load all the passengers on one train either; just play along). One train will be in the "lead" for a while, and just when the other train catches up and is going the same pace, train A hits the brakes and slows its roll. If I were train B and this happened, I would just hit the brakes til the thing stopped completely, wait for the train A to keep chugging along until it realizes train B is nowhere to be seen and start looking for it. Train station hide and seek, if you will.
Why do we do this (I will speak of "us" collectively to give myself some peace of mind that I am not the only person that is emotionally insectual)? Is it because somewhere along those tracks we see a reminder of what we have crashed into before, and we arent ready to take another head on, full speed hit? Or is it because we don't see something so painfully familiar, and that might end up being worse than what we've already dealt with? I can't quite remember, but I think that as a child, if you mess with a potato bug long enough, it stops balling up. It's like, oh, this person really isnt going squash me, they're just passing time. So, eventually, after the slow-speed-stop-go train fiasco goes on long enough, do we give up on tapping the breaks and just go? Do we hop off the track and roll down the mountain until we land on another track that's running on it's own line? Is it not until we actual become aware of what we are doing?
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)